I'm Not Worthy

Sometimes, I just feel inadequate. Like, for instance, when I met Hillary Clinton at a book signing last year. I stressed for days ahead of time about what I could say to her that would display the right combination of respect, admiration, and appreciation without being ridiculous and without pushing her just one step closer to the catatonic zombie-like state she probably feels herself hurtling toward every time she has to endure hours and hours of cheerfully greeting crowds of people at book signings or political rallies.

I mean, what exactly could I say to Hillary Clinton that would even be remotely interesting or memorable to her? After all, she's met Kings and Queens and Popes and Matt Lauer and Barbara Walters and Oprah. I know that pretty much the last thing she probably cares about doing is shaking my hand and listen to anything I might have to say.

But still, I do admire and respect her, and I'd like her to know that. Plus, I have such a thing for any presidential trinkets, including a small, but growing collection of presidential memoirs signed by the authors, that I couldn't avoid taking the opportunity to get her book signed and to meet her.

So, after stressing about what to say, and struggling mightily to build up my courage, I pretty much blew it at the moment of truth. My turn to shake her hand came, I stepped up, she looked at me with a wide smile meant to put normal people at ease, stuck her hand out, waited for me to say something, and I totally froze. I did shake her hand, and once she recognized the signs of celebrity-induced idiocy in me, she said something to the effect of "thanks for coming." I finally managed to get something along the lines of "thank you" out, but it was a struggle, and I doubt she even heard it.

As I was walking away, I felt like the old Chris Farley character on Saturday Night Live - I don't remember his name, but he was always down on himself. He'd do something dumb, then realize how dumb it was, and slap himself in the forehead saying "stupid, stupid, stupid!". That was exactly how I felt.

So, now I'm going to meet another woman that's only slightly lower on my list of really intimidating women - Madeleine Albright. She'll be in town on Friday to sign copies of her book, so I've got a ticket and am trying to figure out what to say to her and to build up enough courage to actually say it.

I mentioned my dilemma to a co-worker today, which was coincidental since he just happened to meet Muhammad Ali, Bo Derek, Chevy Chase, and John Corbett this weekend. They were all in town for some celebrity fight event. Now, meeting Muhammad Ali would probably be as intimidating to me as meeting either Hillary or Madeleine, so I asked the co-worker what he said to Ali. He said, "it's a pleasure and a real honor to meet you."

I can try saying that to Madeleine, but I'm pretty sure I won't be able to get it out.

Comments

[Scott-O-Rama]

Makes me curious: How do you feel about Hillary running for president? What if she was to run against John McCain?

I like Hillary quite a bit as well. I think she's a smart, strong, independent woman. I know that threatens quite a few people, but I think it's great.

How does one get tickets to a book signing anyway?

[Todd]

Getting tickets to the book signing is pretty easy. We just stopped by Changing Hands bookstore and asked. Had to buy a copy of the book also.

As far as Hillary running, I'd like to see her do it since I think she'd make a good president, but I'm not sure she could win. How about a Clinton/McCain ticket? ;)

[EnviroBoi]

I loved both Hillary and Madeleine's books! I wish I could have gone to their signings here in the DC area, but they were way too crowded. I keep secretly hoping to run into them on the street or in the library or something and just happen to have their books on me. ha. [No, I don't lug those tomes around with me all the time ... I have thought about it though.]

The actual point of this comment, actually, is to recommend Queen Noor's book. If you haven't read it, it provides an interesting perspective to some of the same scenes that both Hillary and Madeleine describe.

[Todd (the other one)]

Ah, Hillary. To even mention her running for President here in the South gets you a 'WTF?' look. But I do it, nevertheless. As good as she would be, though, I tend to agree that she couldn't win. Not yet, anyway.

After his speech Wednesday night, I'm all for a Matt Santos Presidency myself! :-)